October /November 2010

SINCERE APOLOGIES FOR ABSENCE FOR LAST FEW MONTHS, NOW HERE YOU CAN CATCH UP

OCTOBER/NOV 2010

An old and treasured friend in Yorkshire has just collected her life P45. The family did me the honour of asking me to speak at the funeral, but I had to refuse as I am just not fit enough at the moment. The horse of life has just come down with me and rolled on me. My son (bless him) said that I had just overdrawn on Life’s Current Account and I was starting to feel the pinch. Well, I suppose that I cannot argue with that, but I am sorry that I cannot see Joanie off properly. She and her husband, Colin, were both treasured friends. I well remember the first time we met. We were dining at a smart-ish house. Colin and I were arguing because we both enjoyed arguing – the subject was something to do with “The Book of Common Prayer”. I do not remember what, it was in 1975. If you drew the covert (the Prayer Book) with Colin, you were certain to find an argument. We got rather heated and Colin whipped out his false teeth, slapped them on the table between us and said that if I insisted on talking such “Papist crap” he would set his teeth on me! He was a lovely man but very human. One Sunday they both came to lunch and Colin was late because he had to call on a client. It was obvious that the client had been hospitable. Colin loved a glass of Claret. He sipped his glass and then fixed his gaze on his neighbour’s plate: “He’s got more f.....g shprouts than I’ve got,”, then with great dignity he slid feet first under the table where he lay for the rest of lunch.

Just been down the town to get some petrol. You see our Prime Minister (French) has hacked the voters off by telling them that they have to work longer to get their pension. They are not best suited and have been picketing refineries to stop petrol getting out – this means that Jean and Jeanne have had great problems topping up the tanks on their cars – the whole point of the Dragon Lady and I moving to a town is to make shopping easier in our Old Age, everything is supposed to be within walking distance. Our nearest Petrol station is just beyond the ring road. It is within walking distance but that is a waste of time, should you need to take your car with you. Well, I had walked down the road to see the man who crushes my bones, joints etc – the things that you need for walking – he lives some clicks out of town. So I asked him about petrol – “Pas de Problem” he said as he had refuelled at the Supermarche that morning! That was good news, as the Supermarket had shut its’ gates yesterday: Anyway, I limped home and roused the Dragon Lady from her chair and we popped down the road and filled up the car. It was a great relief, because we do need a car, even if we are retired and walking to the shops is all very fine, but if you are a cripple, the idea seems to lose its’ gloss somehow. We need to go to England in November and a General Strike is just what we do not want and the French ‘do dearly love a strike’. Some years ago I was stuck on the decks at Cherbourg with 4 horses, there was a seamen’s’ strike and the Channel ports were closed. But that, as they say, is another story.